Whether it’s physical or business related activities, the strength that the other cyclist at the gym displayed can be an example for us all when things get tough, we get injured, or have a setback.  Maybe we get turned down for a promotion, or make a mistake in a meeting; maybe we are training hard for our first marathon when something happens that potentially prevents us from attending the event.  When these things happen it’s all too easy to give up, make excuses, or look for reasons to go in a different, maybe an easier direction.

Too often we say enough is enough and not put things in what should be their proper perspective.  It’s those who figure out how to properly compartmentalize the temporary setbacks that eventually achieve their desired results.  You know, the things that we all admire and wish to have for ourselves – if only.

So what does it take, internal fortitude, positive self-regard, or possibly a willingness and ability to look forward, not backward?  Yes.  But it also takes what I like to call the ability to be YOUR hero.  I say that because if you’re waiting for someone else to set the example for you, you may be waiting for a long time and miss many great opportunities.

Decide today, right now, to be the example, to push yourself past the disappointments and temporary setbacks and go do what most others won’t – be YOUR hero.  If you do, you may discover that you are not alone, and not only are you truly living life, but setting an example and inspiring others along the way.

Really, our limits, for the most part, are self-imposed.  We are limited by our willingness to see beyond what we already know – what others are already doing.  But what if we were not bound by our preconceived notions of reality?  What if we were able to see beyond what exists today, and rather, focused on what we would like to see, or, what would be our desired reality if there was no barrier to its existence?

Achieving great things and breaking through perceived barriers takes hard work and a willingness to fail before seeing what you once thought impossible, actually is possible.  You must believe you, and allow yourself to hear the doubt that others so freely dish out. in the hopes that their status quo remains so that they too don’t have to change.

Whether it’s in business or your personal life, this cyclist will make you think twice before you ever again say – That’s Impossible!

Isn’t that a great feeling?  To accomplish something that is outside your norm and is recognized as something to be admired.  It just doesn’t get much better!

So why don’t we push or stretch ourselves more often – after all, the payoff is extremely gratifying.  Unless the risk is greater than the possible reward, why not?  Mostly, it seems that to achieve these desired results we have to work hard (research, learn, struggle), spend precious time and focus on what doesn’t come naturally  – and that’s a lot of work!

But there’s a payoff, and here it is:

Our sphere of influence, knowledge and ability is like a circle with us in the middle.  We tend to stay within the parameters of that circle because when we push ourselves and eventually reach the outer edge of our sphere, everything beyond that is the unknown.  But here’s the thing, if we push beyond our known boundaries (the circumference of the circle) we don’t just expand our influence, knowledge and ability for that one point, but rather, for the entire circumference of our sphere.

 Think about it, if you stretch yourself in business to land a deal, get a promotion, grow your company, etc., what you learn along the way can / will be used to benefit you professionally for the rest of your life.  If you stretch yourself physically, say to run a marathon, you don’t just learn to run a marathon, you learn about nutrition, training, recovery, physical limits, etc., and you can use that information in many different aspects of your life.

So the next time you’re faced with a daunting task, take a deep breath, puff out your chest and go be YOUR hero.   Not only will you potentially accomplish something great, but you will learn things that will expand your sphere of influence and allow you to not only help yourself, but position you as an example for others to follow and look up to. It’s a lot of work but look at the bright side; at least you don’t have to wear tights!

So how should I feel about this seemingly unfortunate situation?  Well, here are my obvious choices:

1. I view it as an unfortunate situation and focus on  all the negative attributes.

• I broke my wrist while on vacation and had to endure a lot of pain while I hiked down the mountain, got stabilized, and then had to travel home with my arm still broken.
• I lost several days to doctor’s appointments, surgery, and the initial recovery.
• There is an obvious expense for the medical treatments and loss of productivity.

- OR -

2.  I view it as an unfortunate situation but find the good.

• As soon as I hiked down the mountain I was greeted by a group of off season ski patrollers who were fully equipped with emergency medical supplies and immediately stabilized me.
• While retrieving the car to take me to the hospital, my friend came across the local fire chief who then came to get me, arriving right as I was through being stabilized.
• The local medical facility was able to give me medication to make me comfortable, and my friends were able rearranged our flight home so we had no layover. This allowed me to arrive is San Jose in time to still see a surgeon that same day.
• I’m right handed and I broke my left wrist – so I still can do a lot of necessary, everyday activities.
• They put a plate and screws in my arm so I don’t have a cast and had full use of my broken wrist within five days of the surgery.

Here’s the bottom line.  There’s no doubt that this situation was not fun, but I was very fortunate as I could have injured my neck, back, or any number of different possibilities.

How I choose to see my situation will dictate the direction I go as a result of that choice.  If I see the negative side, everything I do will have a negative influence and ultimately, be less than it potentially could have been.  If I see the positive side, everything I do will have a positive influence and potentially be everything it could be.

So how are you going to look at your next challenge?  There’s a positive side in almost every situation, but it’s up to you to uncover and believe it – which ultimately will set your trajectory and determine your destination.

YES, it’s that simple – it’s a choice!

Don’t get me wrong, there’s much that goes into being a leader, but being willing to be seen as “different”, is as good a place as any to start. So what else can you do if your goal or aspiration is to be a leader? Well, here’s a short list of places to start:

• Get clear on what it is that you want to accomplish. You have to have a vision; you have to have a WinVision!
• Be committed. Without commitment you will quit the first time someone looks at you funny or something you’re working on doesn’t quite go as you planned.
• Choose something that’s bigger than you and have humility. It’s not about you, you’re merely a steward to your chosen project’s success.
• Never stop learning. The world moves fast and if you don’t keep yourself abreast to current information and trends, you will quickly fall behind and be out of touch.
• Be approachable, be authentic. You must be willing to symbolically get down on one knee, look someone in the eye and be willing to hear their story – have a “People Matter” mentality.

So if you feel like you’re different and want to capitalize on that attribute; using it for good, rather than evil – symbolically tie on your cape, get into your leadership state of mind and go, go be a hero.

Here’s an example – I was preparing to present a new, important presentation to a large audience and was nervous about it. On the morning of my presentation I was already running late when I noticed I had a water leak in my bathroom. It had flooded the bathroom and was now starting to run out onto the hardwood floor of my bedroom. I quickly turned off the water, grabbed a stack of towels and started throwing them down on the floor while asking myself, “Okay, what the hell could possibly be good or positive about this situation?” And then it hit me – I realized how fortunate I was that this happened while I was still home. If it would have happened just 30 minutes later, I would have come home to thousands of dollars of damage, but instead, all I had were some wet towels and a little delay. Realizing my fortune, rather than my misfortune, I arrived at the event in a good frame of mind, with a lower stress level, and delivered a better presentation because I realized how truly fortunate I was.

So, the next time you’re faced with what appears to be a negative situation, ask yourself if there’s something positive about the outcome. You may find that you’ve actually been blessed with an abundance of fortune cloaked in a veil of perceived misfortune. From there it’s all about what you choose to believe because your fortune will not always be obvious. A delay may have prevented you from being involved in an accident – which you will never know about. Or, a delay could give you just enough time to arrive at a meeting after information has been discovered that completely changes what you otherwise would have done. If you eventually discover why you were fortunate, great! If not, it’s up to you to decide. Your perception will, however, determine your actions, and ultimately, your outcome.

We all have leaks that cover us in stress and delays. It’s up to us to see what’s optimistic about them. Seeing the positive side of what appears to be negative takes practice. It’s a muscle that at first is weak and unresponsive, but with regular training, can grow to be very powerful and able to protect you from the negativity that bombards each and every one of us every day – and that’s the positive side!

In almost all forms of racing the backmarker is the person, vehicle, or whatever, that marks the back of the pack. They / it is often used as motivation to step it up and overtake them before some predetermined point. They are mathematically and psychologically too far away for the current conditions and ability level – yet, with a shift in perception a new possibility can emerge and with it, a new reality of what is possible.

The backmarker is the motivational fortitude that bubbles up within us and gives the energy, strength and creativity to ramp up our performance and overtake the competition. Without the backmarker we would unwittingly continue at our current pace, feeling as if we were truly giving it our all.

In business and in life, approximately 50% of our success comes from our ability, and 50% comes from our attitude. Seeing the backmarker and setting your sights on them / it can help accomplish things that otherwise may have been beyond our grasp and / or ability.

Who / what is your backmarker? What is within your grasp if you found the motivation to step it up and “real them in”? What could you possibly accomplish if you decided you were going to beat someone / something to the finish line? Your potential is regulated by your perception, so find a backmarker, step it up, real them in, and bask in the glory of what you’re truly capable of and what is your new reality.

For the sake of this post, we’ll focus the discussion on verbal gifts that strike a negative cord. So what do you do when someone offers you personal feedback you don’t like? Most of us have an initial reaction of anger and / or self-ridicule, but why? Doing so negatively impacts you and can cause a domino effect on many other aspects of your day. The feedback you received isn’t always valid – it could just be someone’s opinion. If it is valid, it truly is a gift and just like that tie you received for Christmas, you should find a way to incorporate it into your wardrobe. Maybe the tie isn’t quite your style, but with a little effort you could discover a whole new look that could really work for you.

If the feedback / comment isn’t valid, is inappropriate, or you’re just not ready to hear / deal with it yet, don’t accept it! The only way someone’s words can negatively affect you is if you consent to them. I know it’s not easy, and yes, it will take some practice, but if you do, and purposefully choose what to accept as valid, you will not only be controlling your emotions, but the life you live.

So the next time someone offers you a gift, remember, it’s not an obligation to accept it, and that not accepting it can be a gift not only to yourself, but potentially to the person who gave it.

It got me thinking about all the missed opportunities that come our way in life and business and what it would take to recognize that often, all we have to do is take the time to see what’s already around and available to us. After all, “Cat’s in the Cradle” can’t play every time we need to pay attention, and even if it did, it wouldn’t work for every situation – especially in business.

Then, during a luncheon with an extremely successful executive it was stated simply – you need to work, but you also need to make time to run your business. And that was it, “working” isn’t running a business and you have to run your business or eventually, you won’t have any work to do. No matter what you do for a living; even if it’s just running your own life, you have a business to run. Working, in and of itself won’t move you forward. Forward momentum in life and business comes from taking the necessary time to peacefully contemplate and facilitate the required activities that move us and our business forward, and it is that, which produces the work we do and the results we achieve.

So what do we do? Well, here’s my advice… STOP! That’s right, I told you to stop. If only for a brief moment, stop and look around and see what there is to be seen. Too often, we discover after the fact that there was a great opportunity to connect, impact, capture, advance, capitalize, or other verbs, on opportunities that we were too busy to see because we were “working”. We need to take time each day / week to plan, analyze, create, prioritize, contemplate or whatever it is that needs to be done, to move us / our business forward.

So next time your schedule is full and you’re tired from all the work you’ve been doing / have to do, consider what’s really important and what will make the biggest impact on what you ultimately want to accomplish and be known for.

What is your vantage point? Where do you position yourself when you make important decisions in business and for your life? To have a strategic vantage point you need to position yourself, behaviorally, at the most opportune place. So where is that for you? Where do you need to go to have the right vantage point?

Consider the possibilities and the changing perspective you will gleam from seeing your actions from different angles and heights, and the differing context that will accompany each. Change from a linear thought process to a multidimensional, nonlinear approach and consider not only the expected, but the unexpected solutions to your situation. Only then will you truly have the available information to see your situation from a strategic vantage point.

So the next time you need to make an important decision, position yourself to see the different opportunities by shifting your vantage point and quickly adopting an eighth floor view.